Storytime~
I've always been a dreamer for as long as I can remember. I'd have scary dreams and run to my parents room and sleep with them. My dad was a farmer so he'd get up at 3:00 a.m. so usually it would be crawling in bed with my mom. The big bed was better anyways and that security of your mom being right there helped me sleep the rest of the night....well morning. Well I'm embarassed to tell you I haven't grown out of that. (well i don't drive over to my mamas) I've been dreaming crazy dreams where I just talk or jump out of bed or scream bloody murder. Usually I don't remember what I'm dreaming and then sometimes I remember parts. Well last Tuesday evening I remember getting dizzy before bed but just brushed it off as low blood sugar or something. Then in the middle of the night I woke myself up screaming bloody murder and let me tell you I had a hard time getting back to sleep. That next morning I had this heavy pressure in my chest and my left arm was tingling. Now I have acid reflux and get the crazy heartburn, chest pain what have you and years ago they did a bunch of heart tests just to make sure but diagnosed me with reflux. This time I had a tingling going down my entire arm and it scared me I won't lie. I tried to go about my morning but I hated to put it off if something serious was happening. I called the doctor that morning and they wanted me to go to the ER. (joy) Yea I freaked out I won't lie. Long story short and a bazillion tests later I am fine. My heart is healthy, my diet is fine, my exercising is fine we are supposed to exercise people!! ....So what the crap happened? Well I have an appointment with my family doctor in a few weeks but right now I'm calling it anxiety. There was a lady I knew at the ER the same time thinking she was having a heart attack and they determined it was anxiety. I have talked with two other people that get those same symptoms.
CRAZY!!!!!
So why would a Jesus girl have anxiety? Pfffffttttttt you tell me.... Guess I'm not trusting God as much as I thought? Fears of the unknown? Unhappiness when life doesn't go my way? I don't know... just getting old and being an emotional hormonal human being? What I do know is there are times I truly feel trapped. Like there is so much more to life yet I can't seem to move forward. There are days I feel my life caving in on me. There are days I feel like I am the worst Jesus girl, hot and cold all the time, such a hypocrite, you name it I think it. Then there's the insecurity issues I have showing my arms, the issues I have upsetting people, *cough cough people pleaser*, ummmm I am a NUTCASE!!!
Then a verse comes to mind:
1 Peter 5:7
Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.
Then I think of God's love and His grace and His mercy and I could go on and on and on. He is just so sweet. Everyday is a brand new day and He wants me to surrender it to Him. Yes I may have crazy issues I am an imperfect human being but I need to release my "issues" to Him. Yes I may try to please people too much but pleasing God needs to be top priority. Yes I have insecurities but God created me in His image and He thinks I'm pretty perfect. I am enough for God why can't He be enough for me ?
I say I believe God has the best plans for me but do I truly believe it? YES!!!! So it's time for me to stop being wishy washy while I wait! Stop being depressed while I wait! Stop being bitter when everyone else gets their opportunities while I wait!
Mom used to quote Isaiah 64: about waiting on the Lord. It doesn’t mean being complacent. It means understanding that he has a plan, and that we’re not the ones in control. In the meantime, we need to strive to use our gifts and abilities fully. – Tim Tebow
Let's make this life count!
Live Deep
♥
Keep Pressing On
-Victoria Osteenhttp://www.victoriaosteen.com/pages/bloglist.aspx
September 04, 2012
You know how some people just always look like they have it all together in life? One thing I've learned is that trials and difficulties affect all people. No one gets a free ride or a "hall pass" from challenges in this life. If someone is making it, if they are on top of the mountain, it's because they are pressing.
In Philippians 3:13, Paul said it like this, "There is one thing that I do, forgetting the past, I press forward to what lies ahead." He was saying, "I don't care what's happened, I'm pressing forward. I don't want to become complacent. I don't want to get stuck; I'm moving forward."
This isn't always easy. In fact, it's a fight. There is effort involved in pressing on, but with effort comes success. Resistance will come against us all, but we have the choice to either stand still or fight life through!
Scripture calls this the fight of faith—and it's a good fight. Do you know what makes a good fight? When you're on the winning side! You know that you're winning as long as you keep on going—keep pressing, keep praying, keep declaring, keep forgiving, keep obeying His Word. You have to stay in the game if you are going to win!
The enemy will try all day long to take you out by reminding you of what happened in your past. He'll remind you of every time you made a mistake or said something wrong. He'll attack hard on the battlefield of your mind. But do you know how to stand against those negative thoughts when they come? By simply speaking the truth of God's Word. See, you can't speak one thing and think about something else. Your thoughts have to follow your words. That's why Matthew 6:31 says, "Take no thought saying (what shall we eat or what shall we wear)" because when you say something, you are taking hold of it in your heart. If you speak words of worry, you will take hold of worry. If you speak God's promises, you take hold of God's promises.
Today, I encourage you to take hold of the good things God has in store for your future. Keep your eye on the prize. Focus on speaking the Word of God over yourself and your family every single day. Take hold of the truth. Bind it to your heart. Let it nourish and refresh your soul. As you press forward, you'll receive the victory and blessing God has in store for you!
"Brethren, I do not count myself to have apprehended; but one thing I do, forgetting those things which are behind and reaching forward to those things which are ahead, I press toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus." (Philippians 3:13-14, NKJV)
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