2012

Well it's 2012 and I am actually still on the losing weight wagon! First I want to take a moment to reflect on 2011. In January I was so ready to embrace the blonde and improve me but instead things spiraled fast. I didn't treat my body well which showed in my weight BIG TIME! I was on anti-depressants and I just wasn't enjoying life at all! It's been tough trying to turn things around ones mind is totally a battlefield. I started new awful habits and it's hard to break them. One of them is FOOD! There were nights I would just binge like crazy and then hate myself for it! Sometimes it was boredom, sometimes I was lonely, sometimes I just felt like it. Alcohol became a terrible habit as well. It has become something I go to when I'm stressed and need to relax. I don't have a clue why I was in this funk but I'm so thankful I wasn't in it for long. I'll be honest I can see how people have thoughts of ending their lives...... it's easy for your mind to just take over it really is. God had gone from first to last in my life in a matter of moments and it started to reflect in every area of my life. My language, my attitude, my thoughts, actions, etc the list goes on. I have not had to go through the sudden death of a loved one or a divorce or lose a job or anything traumatic so why? Why go through this? I have no reason to be depressed or have anxiety! WHY ME? I may never know why but what I do know is my God is so faithful and I am in such a good place right now. 2012 is "the year"!!! I am down 15lbs.... 15 POUNDS...and this weight loss journey has become so much more than just getting skinny it's learning to crave God again. I'm so excited!!

           I WAS MADE FOR MORE!!

I was made for more than a food addiction. God has wonderful plans for me and it is my job to be healthy and have balance. I am so excited for great things!! I am excited to find a church! I am excited to sing again!

I'm excited to find my inner joy!

 ♥