A Christmas Gift

So I stayed put in my job and had such a beautiful peace about it. This week I was taken into my supervisor's office and told my current job was approved to change. I got promoted!

At first I was happy then I let my mind take off....

You don't deserve that promotion with all the complaining you have done. 

You don't deserve that promotion because you didn't give your 150% best

You don't deserve that promotion you spent too much time on your phone


Blah Blah Blah and the insecurities and awful thoughts just took over and I allowed them in...
Then I started to question myself in taking the promotion.

Should've I waited and proved myself first with the new responsibilities?

Then I took a look at my desk calendar and check out how absolutely sweet God is. He knew that on that particular day I would be promoted





Shame on me! Shame Shame Shame on me! I have been praying for change and for more responsibility for years and just the other week I prayed to make more money so I can give more to His kingdom (I'm learning to pray boldly these days) and here I am doubting, God is so sweet and full of grace and He does answer prayers in His time. I am humbled and so so so so thankful!! Praise God! You better believe I'm going to work my little toosh off to honor that promotion, to honor God, and help others!

So with that said my mind goes to something else I don't deserve....God's precious precious gift of Jesus!! WOW! I did nothing to deserve His promise and you know Mary did nothing to deserve carrying the promise inside of her~ How Incredible!!!! He loves each and every one of us so much and not a single one of us is more important than another. We are ALL so precious to Him so precious that He sacrificed sending His son to die for us. Jesus shouldn't have died for our sins~ we should've been on that cross! We don't deserve His love and mercy but it's FREE it's something we can't earn......how beautiful is that?!? AHHHHHH

**chills**

And all the little details..... 

Mary just a virgin girl not a princess or a queen.

He is pure

Born in a dark place....a barn not a fancy Inn.

He is our Light

Shepherds were out living in the fields keeping watch over their flocks

He is our shepherd

We received the most beautiful precious Christmas gift on that special day. A gift I don't ever want to take for granted. A gift I hold dear in my heart and don't ever want to let go!

Merry Christmas!

Starting Over

So much has happened since my last post. I have had a lot change inside of me in only a few short weeks....

Let's start with the "diet"~

So some of my blog readers I see daily have heard me say I wanted to finish Insanity before the end of the year. Unfortunately that just isn't going to happen. I'm not going to say it's because I can't because I absolutely have it in me to finish! I have surprised myself a lot this year with plenty of accomplishments I have it in me (well through Christ I can do all things) to complete Insanity. These last few months I just haven't been eating properly to keep my energy up so I need to get that under control but I continue going to the gym three times a week with my buddy and I started exercising in the evenings again. (not so insane routines~ LOL) With all that said I want to take care of this body of God's and finish the year STRONG!! The year started on fire with me wanting to take care of myself to complete God's will~

Jeremiah 29:11 For I know the plans I have for you....

It's been an awesome yet challenging year of "starting over" and I want to finish 2012 strong!

Let's do it together friends!! We can do this!!! MADE FOR MORE!!


"Career"-

God has been so sweet to me! The more I spend time with Him and in His presence the more He shows me Himself...the more I get to know Him! I'm so in love!! I've been on this journey of figuring out His will for me but I ended up stressing myself out over it. So worried I was missing the path or taking the wrong ones, worried I messed it up and He gave up on me to find someone else to fulfill His will. My fears and insecurities have overshadowed any peace I was suppose to have at all in any of this. However through it all I have been consistent in my prayers asking for the Holy Spirit of discernment to pour into me, asking for revelation and wisdom and peace, and I finally FINALLY had a breakthrough! God revealed Himself to me in a HUGE outpouring of His spirit. He filled me up in such a way I can't even describe it to you! Almost like I've been born again and want to shout it to the world! Friends there is so much more to the Jesus girl thing! When we accept Christ as our savior that's not it.....we don't have to just try to get by there is so much more God has for us!! He wants us to walk in His spirit every single day! He wants to give us His power! Now I don't mean like Harry Potter power here friends.....not wizard style but Holy Spirit Jesus style. Please please study the bible and receive ALL He has for you! We CAN have victory but we can't just sit back and boss Jesus around asking Him to do it for us we must must must do our part in devotion, prayer, study, and walking the walk.

So here's a revelation I had these last few weeks:

Matthew 4:20- At once they dropped their nets and followed Him

WOW! The disciples dropped their nets AT ONCE! Why do I make it so hard to do that? What is my net?

Is my net my past? My current job? What?

Well, my net is ME! I had to die to ME ME ME! I had to move out so the Holy Spirit could fully move in!

Psalm 23:3-He refreshes and restores my life (my self); He leads me in the paths of righteousness [uprightness and right standing with Him—not for my earning it, but] for His name’s sake.

 

He refreshes & restores my soul... I have Joyce Meyer's amplified bible and check this out:

When David says God will restore our souls and our lives I believe he means that God will return us to the state or condition we were in before we erred from following the good plan God had predestined for us before our birth, or before Satan attacked us to draw us out of God's plan for our lives.

WOW WOW WOW!!

Where was I when I got off of the path? When did Satan attack me? Well I know exactly where I was and I don't necessarily think He is going to send me back to that particular job but I was believing to be a big part of music at that time and I allowed Satan to distract me with the way I was being treated and I got off of that path. I entered a season of depression and you can read some of my other blog posts for that story (I don't want to exhaust that story~ wink wink).

I was called for Worship!!!!!!!!!!!!! There is a particular moment I remember talking with my coworker about fourish years ago. I had just sung at the church I grew up in and I was so on fire for music! I had this strong sense that my dream of music was going to finally come true. However Satan got a stronghold on me and I allowed it! Yet in some crazy way I'm so thankful for that season. God has helped me come out stronger and I can now help those going through the same emotions or season in life.

The job I get paid to do is my ministry. No matter what position I am in I need to be a little ray of sunshine spreading the love of Jesus everywhere I go! The thing I'm good at is my calling. Singing is my calling (maybe even blogging LOL) and even if it never turns into my full time ministry I'll be ok. I have the Holy Spirit in me and I desire to continue studying the fruits of the spirit and live them out. To be a little ambassador for Jesus!!

Emotions~

Matthew 26:37- ³And taking with Him Peter and the two sons of Zebedee, He began to show grief and distress of mind and was ^[deeply depressed.

Friends I get so disgusted with myself when I'm down in the dumps. I think since I have Jesus in me and I'm so blessed there is no reason I should get depressed. Guess what??????? Jesus was depressed!!! He was about to go to the cross and He began to become depressed. Who wants to die that way? Come on!! Yet He wanted to fulfill God's will so He pushed through those emotions! His disciples fell asleep they were not there for Him. Sometimes we feel so alone because nobody is there for us but Jesus knows how that feels and He wants to meet you where you are and comfort you. Rest in Him my friends, rest in His love. He died for you! Take that in for a moment! WOW!!

Life is challenging and I am human! I am not letting God down by becoming discouraged or depressed. It's going to happen from time to time but just knowing He is there for me to rest in....

ahhhhhhhhhh!!! makes me cry with tears of joy!

♥



 

I want to be Greater for God

“Some people never get greater because they’re not willing to leave good behind. There is a cost to pay. Whether it’s giving up something from your past or relinquishing control of your future, you will have to make a sacrifice.”

“The real risk isn’t in launching out into a new life of greater things. It’s staying in your old life of the ordinary.”
~ Steven Furtick, Greater


God I pray you will bring my friends peace of mind. Whatever they may be going through God pour your strength into them and give them peace . I pray they receive a new passion for you God. Encourage them to become greater for YOU! Whether it's something new or just being greater where they are at in this season of life give them a fire in their belly to be GREAT! If they are struggling with discernment of your will I pray for the Holy Spirit of discernment to just pour into them Lord. Give them a new confidence in you, a new faith in you! WE TRUST YOU GOD! WE TRUST YOU GOD! You are so faithful! You make all things work together for our good. You have our best interest at heart! We love you God. Thank you God! Praise you God! Teach us to be greater for you God.

In Jesus' precious Holy Name

AMEN

I wanted to share this blog with you! I am praying for you! If you are in a season of your faith being tested don't you dare give up! God is with you!

Have a wonderful weekend for Jesus!

http://sport.org/2012/12/07/when-your-faith-is-tested/

Greater Things

This morning I was on my Jesus high! I was excited by an upcoming singing opportunity coming up and I spent a great time in prayer with God over that. I have been excited revisiting the book Greater by Pastor Steven Furtick and doing the online bible study at www.melissataylor.org, it was such a great morning in the Lord!

JESUS IS IN ME!!

Then about mid morning my little world came caving in around me and I'm sitting here reflecting on the day still in "SMH" mode.

Long story short I have been employed at the same place for ten years and I'm in a ginormous funk. I sit dreaming of what I think the greater life for God would be. I'm ashamed to admit it but I have also been a complainer about my situation and my attitude has stunk like stinky roadkill (apologies for the sudden visual). However with that said recently I have really been digging into the word, reading a lot, surrounding myself with positive influences, focusing on God and praying His will be done.....Things were starting to turn around. I was becoming content with where I was at and I realize my paid job right now is my ministry and I need to allow God to walk through my feet everyday. Then Monday during the Greater conference call bible study Pastor Furtick says this:

 "Sometimes greater doesn't always mean bigger. Sometimes you need to stay put when your situation seems boring or unexciting only to get greater passion for Christ". (Im sorry if I didn't get this quote exact)

SO WOW!! THis is my situation! Yes Yes Yes God I will stay put!! OK!!!

So going to work this morning I was convinced that I need to stay put and I was just going about my day trusting and relying on that thought. Well little did I realize those thoughts and my trust would be put to the test. Midmorning I was approached about a job, I was asking questions about a few days before, that I would have to go backwards in order to go forwards for. Does that make sense? My pride says I've been employed here too long to go backwards (that's not fair),  my past experience and hurt says don't trust anyone you will get hurt again.

So what does a Jesus girl do?

Is God testing me on my trust?

Is there a chance that Satan could use my wishy washy attitude and make me think I don't have peace therefore making me stay put when in fact God wants me to move on?

 I have prayed the 'Yes God' prayer, the use me God prayer, the 'I know you have plans for me Lord' prayer, the 'I WAS MADE FOR MORE THAN THIS' prayer!! I have gone to the bathroom(my prayer room) at work many times frustrated because I did not see my life this way at all crying out to God to change my situation and now here I am faced with a decision I am having trouble making. If today's open opportunity is God answering all my prayers I don't want to mess it up. I don't want to fail this test and circle the same mountain again for the next 40 years. I don't want my fears to overshadow the peace the Holy Spirit is trying to give me about it. The truth is that no, this isn't my dream job however I don't know who I can "minister" to. I don't know whose day I can brighten on the way to my dream job.

"The only thing standing in the way of a greater life is ME"~ this is so very very true!

John 14:12 (AMP) ¹² I assure you, most solemnly I tell you, if anyone steadfastly believes in Me, he will himself be able to do the things that I do; and he will do even greater things than these, because I go to the Father.

We have the advantage of Jesus living in us if we accept Him. UMMMMM WOW!! We have the Holy Spirit in us to guide us through life how incredibly blessed we are! We can do even greater things for the glory of God because we have Him in us! DUDE!!!! So ridiculous and of course I mean COOL! I'm in awe and I don't deserve His grace but I am so thankful to receive it!

And now as I reflect on 'Sometimes greater isn't always bigger' I now realize that I have not been given a chance to be promoted at my paying job. I will not get a raise in pay, a new fancy job title, and recognition for my great work. However what if by taking a chance on a new position I brighten someone's day, what if a smile over the telephone will help someone through their frustration, or what if I bring someone with me to heaven?

That's worth more than a buck more an hour my friends...

That's worth more than gold

What's Your Legacy?

I'm going to just dig right in with this one right away...

If you died today how many lives have you touched? Are you going to heaven and if so are you bringing anyone with you?

My husband's pap died recently and it hurt saying goodbye more than I thought it would. Seeing the people that came to his viewing was just humbling. This man touched

so many lives. Hearing the special memories at the funeral and being reminded of the man he was. He left a legacy on this earth.....He left his beaming smile, his laugh,

and so much more. As I sat there at the viewing seeing the line out the door I sat there and wandered to myself have I in anyway touched any lives? What will my legacy be?

Friends, are you reaching out to people? Are you giving to the helpless? Are you uplifting the hopeless? Jesus' ministry was based around giving to the

poor and helping those that nobody else wanted to help. Do you know Jesus? This Christmas you will receive gifts under the tree but have you received the most important

gift of all? You see God sacrificed His son so we would have a way to Him. If we ask God into our hearts, into our lives the Holy Spirit comes and lives inside of us what better more

precious gift is there? We have God living inside of us helping us through the messes of life. No, it's not an "easy button" but it sure helps when you feel alone, when you lost

all strength, when you feel helpless. God loves you so so much! We must receive all of Him, we must do His will and help anyone we can. We must leave a legacy just like the song

by Nicole Nordeman says:

I want to leave a legacy
How will they remember me?
Did I choose to love? Did I point to You enough
To make a mark on things?
I want to leave an offering
A child of mercy and grace who
blessed your name unapologetically
And leave that kind of legacy

It's time to step it up. To be that light in the world of darkness. To do all I can for the glory of God.

To leave a beautiful legacy that points to God.

I love you all & pray you have a blessed Thanksgiving surrounded by family and friends!

♥

here's a great blog I wanted to share:

http://heatherbleier.com/2012/11/13/preparing-a-place/

Dear Lysa Terkeurst

Dear Lysa,

   I thank God for your gift of writing! I also thank God for your heart for God and your willingness to share your struggles in books. I want to share with you my journey which you have had a beautiful part in.

You see I am a Jesus girl! I was saved at age 5 and I was always little miss goody two shoes Christian girl. I was very vocal on my beliefs and I always strived to do what was right in the eyes of God. I loved my Jesus very much! During our high school talent shows I would sing my Contemporary Christian songs while everyone else used Secular music. I won't ramble on much more but I just wanted to give you an idea of that part of me.

A few years ago I hit a season in life that just doesn't make sense for someone who has Jesus.....or does it? My husband and I pulled our membership out of the church we grew up in, the church we met at, the church we were baptized in, the church we got married in. I can't even pinpoint as to why? It all just happened so fast. Before I knew it I was spiraling down a dark path that led to food addiction which led to major weight gain, I turned to alcohol on bad days instead of Jesus, I hit a season of depression , and I also had thoughts of suicide. Looking back on it all my choices were a result of me taking God out of the center of my life. The most amazing truth is He still has plans for me and loves me no matter what. He died to give me life a life I had thoughts of ending. What a selfish selfish thought. He chose to show me His love in such a way I wish I could better describe. He reached in and rescued me from my depression pit and brought healing and a second chance.

As I was in my "recovery" season I came across your book 'Made To Crave' thanks to Melissa Taylor doing an online bible study. That book was a HUGE part of my transformation back to Jesus. I can't even thank you enough or express how blessed I feel....GLORY TO GOD!! I have such a new outlook on life even bigger then I did when I was that goody two shoes Jesus girl. I want everyone to know my God and I mean fully know Him! We were given such a beautiful gift that makes me just pause in awe thinking, WOW! He chose me to live out His plan. ME!! I want to live it right! I want to do all I can, grow all I can, behave all i can which leads me to Unglued. Oh my behaving like a Jesus girl is hard work but with God ALL things are possible!! I can't thank you enough for another great book! I can't thank Melissa Taylor enough for organizing the bible studies! Thank you ladies for allowing God to use you to help His people live this life strong!

I'm not where I need to be but I'm sure not where I was and for that I praise God!

I was absolutely made for more than a food addiction and being unglued!

Life brings choices and I choose imperfect progress!

♥

FINALLY

I saw a commercial on the new CBO sandwitch at McDonalds and my mouth just watered. (stupid advertising) Of course the thing has BACON on it! (((sigh))) Well the next day my coworker was headed to the golden arches and she asked if I wanted anything. DUH I told her to get me that sandwich. Then as I sat at my desk I could feel angel me on one shoulder and devil me on the other. As they were arguing back and forth I finally texted the coworker and told her NO!!!!!!!


YES I SAID NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

My flesh was throwing the biggest hissy fit EVER! I wanted to punch something, somebody, or throw something. It was awful!! HOWEVER I felt so empowered that I went home and put in an INSANITY workout!! A MONTH 2 workout this is how proud I was!

OH SHOOT


I'm not gonna lie I lost strength! BIG TIME!! I'm almost back to girl push ups but I guess that's what taking a two month break does to the body. I got through it with some fast forwarding involved...I predict I knocked 15 minutes off the workout but hey baby steps right???

HA

It felt good! One good decision at a time!


We can do this!! We were made for more!!

So much more!!

DIG DEEP
♥

Runaway Thoughts

I had every intentions of this being my breakthrough exercise post! I got off track big time with my healthy living and while I was sitting in the McDonald's parking lot today I thought to myself that this is absolutely ridiculous! This girl has got to get back on track! I received the sweetest message from my cousin telling me how thin I looked and it meant so much to me yet here I am ruining all my hard work with grease! I even texted an INSANITY girlfriend hoping it would keep me accountable. I'm sorry to say it did not. I came home in a rotten mood and did not exercise. I was so angry at the world. So irritated to go back to work after a beautiful week away visiting my sister and their new baby boy! I even prayed this morning asking God for help with my attitude but I felt like He went MIA today! Where was He? I prayed for help why didn't He help me? My attitude was awful and kept getting worse. I was so irritated by everyone around me. I wanted to just get up and walk out at one point I was so frustrated. I didn't want to be there at all! Don't you people get it? I am supposed to be doing something else! Every part of my being believes there is something else in this world I am supposed to be doing that I was not made to work where I work doing what I do for a paycheck! WHY GOD AM I STILL HERE!?!?!? I became very angry at God today! All these emotions inside of me, the hurt, the resentment, the bitterness, the pain I thought I released at Jesus' feet came bubbling up today all at once. Why? What am I doing wrong? Am I the worst Jesus girl? Should I just give up and face the "fact" that I will never be Christlike that it's just impossible? I'm destined to feel like this forever?

Then I read my email and Melissa Taylor, who is leading the online Unglued bible study based on Lysa Terkeurst's book, had a blog post about chapter 10 'Negative Inside Chatter'. This chapter was written for me my friends! I do this all day long no joke! I was reminded once again that I am not alone and that yes I absolutely can do this! I can make progress.....imperfect progress because I am not perfect but good news is that nobody is!

Here's a part of Melissa's blog post:
http://melissataylor.org/

Just take a peek at the first page of this chapter:

It’s time to tackle negative inside chatter—those misguided thoughts that can easily turn into perceptions that then all too easily turn into dangerous realities. And realities based on runaway feelings rather than truth always lead to one thing—insecurity….Toxic thoughts are so dangerous because they leave no room for truth to flourish. and lies are what reign in the absence of truth.

Thinking runaway, worrisome thoughts is just an invitation to anxiety.

WOW!!! For those of you who don't know me, a month ago I had a health scare that led me to the ER thinking I was having a heart attack. After being hooked up to all kinds of machines, tested, poked, and prodded the doctor diagnosed me with stress. STRESS! How embarrassing! When I read this chapter it was just so clear to me that my runaway thoughts are destroying my health!! I don't want to be in bondage to my own mind any longer! I desperately long for peace.

"O God chisel me. I don't want to be locked in my hard places forever. I want to be free. I want to be all that You have in mind for me to be" -Unglued

 

Oh the INSANITY

Do you want the good news or the bad news first?

Good News: I finished a workout FINALLY after several days of not

Bad News: It was not a Month 2 Insanity workout it was a Month 1. I have been barely getting by with workouts this past month since my little health scare and let me tell you I have lost not only motivation but strength as well.

Good News: HOWEVER the good news is our bodies adapt very quickly so if I actually make an effort and keep this up I will be back in shape in no time!!


So the eating:

Well I finished an entire can of pringles by myself yesterday and then hubby grilled big juicy cheeseburgers for supper. I have also been on an iced coffee kick and no not the nonfat lattes I was getting before they are the sugar and cream loaded iced coffees. BAD BAD BAD! So I confessed of my eating sins on our 'Made For More' group page and guess what?!?

Who the crap cursed my iced coffee???? Huh? Huh? Because today I got one and it sucked monkey turds!! It was so disgusting I took a few sips and threw it out! There's $3.00 down the tube. :(


I'll take the hint it's back on track people it's back on track! I was made for more than laziness!! I was made for more than my stubborness!! I was made for more than an iced coffee addiction!

I can do this!!

HEADING NORTH!

& if I can do this so can you so put down the pringles, get off your bum, and go workout!

NOW

DIG DEEP!
♥

Set the world on fire

"If you don't straighten up I'm going to put you up for adoption!!" said a very annoyed father of two very energetic teenage girls fighting. This happened right infront of my eyes at Walmart yesterday the very day after I spent my entire Saturday in the streets of Philly feeding drug addicts. This comment bothered me very much. The daughters didn't even bat an eyelash at what the father said and it makes me wonder why.... are they that use to their daddy speaking like that to them? It bothered me! I just spent a day with people who have allowed drugs to take over their life and I wonder.. did their parents ever have anything nice to say to them? Or is this all they know because their parents did the same thing? Or maybe they had a great upbringing and made some dumb choices and here they are? I'm not going to know the answers if I don't get to know them. I would like to get to know them and tell them about the life they could have. A beautiful life their heavenly father died for. I truly had no idea what I signed up for I just knew I wanted to help more. I felt God prodding me to get out their and reach out and be His hands and feet so I signed up for the first thing that came along. A trip to Philadelphia to cook hot dogs while everyone else told them about Jesus and told them about Victory Outreach a place they could go stay at to get healthier FOR FREE! Carrie and I were knocking out the dogs let me tell you so I didn't have a lot of time to truly process what was taking place. I do remember one girl especially who was so shocked the hot dogs were free. She just lost her house and was so excited to get some food! Carrie gave her a hug and she was crying a bit. I do remember more being so thankful and excited over hot dogs. After the cooking was over we were standing there waiting for the grill to cool down I remember just taking it all in. The filth all around us, the trash, the people with no hope, the people going down the street for a temporary high and coming back up for free food or just conversation, the fighting, the whitnesses trying to show them hope telling them of a God who loves them. Jesus adores these people and most of these people just don't care about themselves. Most of them never had anybody to tell them they could be great in this world. Nobody positive in their life to speak great things into them! I can't sit back and do nothing anymore! I want every single person I cooked a hot dog for on Saturday to know Jesus! I can't rely on missionaries or strong brave Christians to do the job! I have to do my part! This life is not all about me! I am living for eternity who am I taking with me? This life doesn't end here and forever is a very long time how can I sit back and watch people suffer? How can I not even try?

Isaiah 58:10

Amplified Bible (AMP)

¹⁰ And if you pour out that with which you sustain your own life for the hungry and satisfy the need of the afflicted, then shall your light rise in darkness, and your obscurity and gloom become like the noonday.

 

We all make our own choices and even cause our own pain by those choices but Jesus never said let my people suffer. They chose to shoot up heroin instead of getting a job so let them suffer.....NO! We need to reach out and encourage them! We need to share God's love with this world!

 

 

Step it up! We have got to step it up!

 

 

 

 

 

 

Well done...

Happy Friday!!!!!

I am still determined to strive to make everyday a FRIDAY! Why is it that on Friday everyone has an extra stride in their step? A little extra joy? That special feeling that the work week is about over! I want to live everyday like FRIDAY!!

Storytime~

So I can't trust leaving my dogs out to roam and do their biz because they will wonder off to the neighbors or just chow down on poo. Sorry TMI but it's just the truth. So I have to stand at my door or outside on the doorstep and watch my dogs go do their biz one at a time. This morning I realized that when I get impatient waiting and call for Riley (in a mean impatient mommy tone) she turns and slowly walks towards me like oh man I'm in trouble and when I say slowly I mean the dog barely moves at all. But when she starts obeying me I start praising her saying, "Good Girl, Riley! Come! Good Girl!" because I'm happy she's obeying and suddenly she's happy too and gets a certain stride in her step and even starts running towards me sometimes. She's happy that I'm happy and I'm happy she's being obedient! Then it hits me~ why am I not like this with God more? My main goal should be to be His hands and feet and to want to obey Him at all times and have that stride in my step and even run towards Him! My goal at the end of the day should be to hear God say, "Well done my faithful servant!"

Moriah Peters has a new song out based on the verse Matthew 25:21 and as I think about how my dog Riley gets a stride in her step for being a good girl and making mommy happy I too should get a stride in my step for doing my heavenly father's work and hearing Him say well done.

Lyrics to Well Done :

So let my life speak loud and clear
Lord, I wanna hear

Well done, well done
I'm gonna chase You, Lord
I'm gonna show the world Your love, woah
I'll run, I'll run
I'm gonna run this race
To hear You say well done

I'm so glad that I get to serve You, Lord
You're the only One I am living for, woah
I'm gonna run straight into Your open arms
I'm gonna follow You with my all heart, woah, woah

I know my ultimate goal needs to be getting my mind off of myself and onto others. Reaching out more and getting out of my comfort zone! Running this race and finishing right! It's not too late!!

Never Give Up!

♥

Check out today's Joyce Meyer devotional:

Back on Track

by Joyce Meyer - posted September 21, 2012

For we are God's [own] handiwork (His workmanship), recreated in Christ Jesus, [born
anew] that we may do those good works which God predestined (planned beforehand) for us [taking paths which He prepared ahead of time], that we should walk in them [living the good life which He prearranged and made ready for us to live].
—Ephesians 2:10

We are God's own handiwork. He created us with His own hands. We got messed up, so we had to be recreated in Christ Jesus. We had to be born again so that we could go ahead and do those good works that God had preplanned and predestined for us before Satan tried to ruin us.

Just because you and I have had trouble in our lives or just because we have made mistakes does not mean that God's plan has been changed. It is still there. All we have to do is get back on track.

From the book New Day, New You by Joyce Meyer. Copyright © 2006 by Joyce Meyer. Published by InProv. All rights reserved.

Content..

I got through a few workouts last week but yea not really. The one day I would finish one interval circuit and then fast forward to the next (you do each interval three times) until finally I just got annoyed and quit. I'm not in this at all anymore. I've hit that wall I'm having trouble getting through. My eating is better ok ok except the weekends oh and the ice coffee addiction I started again but with that said the scale is creeping down slowly again however the exercise I am struggling with! These last 20lbs or so are going to be HARD HARD HARD! Heck I'll be happy and possibly even content with 10 more at this point! HA!

con·tent

adjective

satisfied with what one is or has; not wanting more or anything else.

 

 

 

 

Nope! I don't want to be content! I don't want to be satisfied..... I want to keep striving for more! To better myself and always improve!

 

 

As I say that now I will get up and try to actually finish a workout!

 

 

DIG DEEP!

♥

Poop Happens

Well kiddos I regret to inform you that Month 2 has yet to start! :(

I could blame it on my week at work so far but truth be told I go into "screw" it mode when I'm stressed. I don't care I just want to eat junk and not workout and have a poor me pity party. Thankfully I haven't over done it on the food I just haven't started INSANITY yet & I have had a poor me pity party.... quite a few of them actually.

 I have a slight feeling when I do start INSANITY again I will hate the world cuz this girl is gonna be T I R E D ! but it will be GREAT!!

So my goal for tonight is to start Month 2 & bust my boootay !!


I'm going to push myself to

DIG DEEP
♥

Ready for Month 2 Try 2 of Insanity!

I'm ready! I am so so so ready to get back on track! I HATE HATE HATE that gross feeling of just not being mindful of what I'm eating. That full miserable feeling of eating way too much! Bleh! I'm ready to feel good,workout hard, & lose this last bit of weight!!

I'm ready for positive thinking and motivation!


Month 2 starts tomorrow & it is ON!


DIG DEEP
♥

Getting Back on Track

So I'm up 5lbs and that's just from my BEACH getaway. May I say something entirely honest? It was farking soooooooo worth it!! I needed to relax and let my hair down LOL and I had me some BACON cheese fries!! Yummmmmmmo!!

HOWEVER I forgot how hard it is to get back on track! Plus it's the "pms" week before when I want to eat everything in sight and for some crazy reason I just want me some M&M's.

Next week starts Month 2 of INSANITY so it's go time people! We got this! We can do this! Keep it up! I've got blubber to get rid of before cute winter sweaters! I am excited to wear a turtleneck sweater again with a pair of dress pants and not worry about my bulge sticking out all over (yea the back bulge and the muffin top). LET'S GO!!!!!!!!


We were made for so much more than a food addiction! We were made for so much more than to be lazy!


DIG DEEP!!
 ♥

Make life count while you wait

Well my friends this last week has been ummm well.....lets just say interesting. I always said I would be completely honest with everything in this "rollercoaster". Maybe you will call me a nutcase or maybe you can relate and just knowing someone else is going through the same thing makes you feel better? I don't know but here we go~

Storytime~

I've always been a dreamer for as long as I can remember. I'd have scary dreams and run to my parents room and sleep with them. My dad was a farmer so he'd get up at 3:00 a.m. so usually it would be crawling in bed with my mom. The big bed was better anyways and that security of your mom being right there helped me sleep the rest of the night....well morning. Well I'm embarassed to tell you I haven't grown out of that. (well i don't drive over to my mamas) I've been dreaming crazy dreams where I just talk or jump out of bed or scream bloody murder. Usually I don't remember what I'm dreaming and then sometimes I remember parts. Well last Tuesday evening I remember getting dizzy before bed but just brushed it off as low blood sugar or something. Then in the middle of the night I woke myself up screaming bloody murder and let me tell you I had a hard time getting back to sleep. That next morning I had this heavy pressure in my chest and my left arm was tingling. Now I have acid reflux and get the crazy heartburn, chest pain what have you and years ago they did a bunch of heart tests just to make sure but diagnosed me with reflux. This time I had a tingling going down my entire arm and it scared me I won't lie. I tried to go about my morning but I hated to put it off if something serious was happening. I called the doctor that morning and they wanted me to go to the ER. (joy) Yea I freaked out I won't lie. Long story short and a bazillion tests later I am fine. My heart is healthy, my diet is fine, my exercising is fine we are supposed to exercise people!! ....So what the crap happened? Well I have an appointment with my family doctor in a few weeks but right now I'm calling it anxiety. There was a lady I knew at the ER the same time thinking she was having a heart attack and they determined it was anxiety. I have talked with two other people that get those same symptoms.

CRAZY!!!!!

So why would a Jesus girl have anxiety? Pfffffttttttt you tell me.... Guess I'm not trusting God as much as I thought? Fears of the unknown? Unhappiness when life doesn't go my way? I don't know... just getting old and being an emotional hormonal human being? What I do know is there are times I truly feel trapped. Like there is so much more to life yet I can't seem to move forward. There are days I feel my life caving in on me. There are days I feel like I am the worst Jesus girl, hot and cold all the time, such a hypocrite, you name it I think it. Then there's the insecurity issues I have showing my arms, the issues I have upsetting people, *cough cough people pleaser*, ummmm I am a NUTCASE!!!

Then a verse comes to mind:
1 Peter 5:7
Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.

Then I think of God's love and His grace and His mercy and I could go on and on and on. He is just so sweet. Everyday is a brand new day and He wants me to surrender it to Him. Yes I may have crazy issues I am an imperfect human being but I need to release my "issues" to Him. Yes I may try to please people too much but pleasing God needs to be top priority. Yes I have insecurities but God created me in His image and He thinks I'm pretty perfect. I am enough for God why can't He be enough for me ?

I say I believe God  has the best plans for me but do I truly believe it? YES!!!! So it's time for me to stop being wishy washy while I wait! Stop being depressed while I wait! Stop being bitter when everyone else gets their opportunities while I wait!

Mom used to quote Isaiah 64: about waiting on the Lord. It doesn’t mean being complacent. It means understanding that he has a plan, and that we’re not the ones in control. In the meantime, we need to strive to use our gifts and abilities fully. – Tim Tebow


Let's make this life count!
Live Deep
♥

Keep Pressing On

-Victoria Osteen
http://www.victoriaosteen.com/pages/bloglist.aspx

September 04, 2012
You know how some people just always look like they have it all together in life? One thing I've learned is that trials and difficulties affect all people. No one gets a free ride or a "hall pass" from challenges in this life. If someone is making it, if they are on top of the mountain, it's because they are pressing.


In Philippians 3:13, Paul said it like this, "There is one thing that I do, forgetting the past, I press forward to what lies ahead." He was saying, "I don't care what's happened, I'm pressing forward. I don't want to become complacent. I don't want to get stuck; I'm moving forward."


This isn't always easy. In fact, it's a fight. There is effort involved in pressing on, but with effort comes success. Resistance will come against us all, but we have the choice to either stand still or fight life through!


Scripture calls this the fight of faith—and it's a good fight. Do you know what makes a good fight? When you're on the winning side! You know that you're winning as long as you keep on going—keep pressing, keep praying, keep declaring, keep forgiving, keep obeying His Word. You have to stay in the game if you are going to win!


The enemy will try all day long to take you out by reminding you of what happened in your past. He'll remind you of every time you made a mistake or said something wrong. He'll attack hard on the battlefield of your mind. But do you know how to stand against those negative thoughts when they come? By simply speaking the truth of God's Word. See, you can't speak one thing and think about something else. Your thoughts have to follow your words. That's why Matthew 6:31 says, "Take no thought saying (what shall we eat or what shall we wear)" because when you say something, you are taking hold of it in your heart. If you speak words of worry, you will take hold of worry. If you speak God's promises, you take hold of God's promises.


Today, I encourage you to take hold of the good things God has in store for your future. Keep your eye on the prize. Focus on speaking the Word of God over yourself and your family every single day. Take hold of the truth. Bind it to your heart. Let it nourish and refresh your soul. As you press forward, you'll receive the victory and blessing God has in store for you!


"Brethren, I do not count myself to have apprehended; but one thing I do, forgetting those things which are behind and reaching forward to those things which are ahead, I press toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus." (Philippians 3:13-14, NKJV)

Embrace Who You Are

Ok here's the thing....

I am over this "diet"! I am over exercise! I want to quit! I want to do whatever I want and not have to worry about bulge! THIS SUCKS!

However the truth is we need discipline in our lives and I will always have a weight problem if I don't keep it in check. So I need to suck it up and keep going!

This weekend I went dress shopping and cried the whole way home I was so discouraged. I have worked so damn hard but still have "problem" areas. I ruined a perfectly good day because all I could focus on was the negative.

I'm tired of wasting moments and even entire days being depressed or just down or unhappy. I'm tired of hating what I see in the mirror. I'm tired of being tired! ha!

So for all the years I spent untagging myself in facebook pics or just negatively talking about myself in a picture I am taking a picture of myself everyday and saying something positive to me.

Embrace who you are and look in that mirror and tell yourself how incredibly awesome you are!!


Today's pic:

Well follow me on instagram because I can't figure out how to load the pic here yet!


LOL


Live Deep
♥

So Over It

We all have bad days and we just need to learn from them and move on..


Success is getting back up and trying again....and trying again.....and trying again!!!!

Tonight was a sucky workout night and I can only blame myself. I was just irritated I don't know my own irritation irritated me. blek! I just wasn't into it at all plus the husband started canning peppers and there was a strong vinegar smell which added to my irritation then my dog kept licking my sweat and that was extremely irritating so by the last maybe 15 minutes I was just half assing it.

Makes me mad at myself that I became "unglued" with my workout! I SHOULD just turn around and go make myself go do it again as punishment but naaaaaaa!! Maybe my body just needs to rest.

The diet on the other hand is going great! I snuck on the scale this morning and was down three pounds!!!!!! Could be just water weight with all the peeing I'm doing but hey I'll take it I haven't lost more than like 0.5lb in months haha! Ok ok I guess weeks but it's hard when you loose every week fairly consistently and then BAM done~ plateau city and you are working your tooshy off but yea not really off because it's not shrinking!!!! EWWWWW!!!!! GRRRRR!!! I think this diet may just be what helps me get through these last 20 ish pounds!!!!!

Don't give up!

Live Deep!
 ♥

Challenge Yourself

I'm not gonna lie there are days I just feel like quitting and eating whatever the crap I want to. I've been at this so long I just get tired and frustrated and jealous of those who don't have to work as hard. Sooooo what do I do? I challenge myself even further because I'm INSANE!!!

I have been allowing myself foods that are NOT beneficial for me and will NOT help with my continued weight loss. So I researched diets and I found one that should help with my energy, speeding up my metabolism, and keep me healthy! HOWEVER I am supposed to drink a gallon of water a day. A FREAKING GALLON!!!!! Do you know what that does to a 5' gal like myself? I feel like I could float (hmm my ninja jumps should be light and airy look out Shaun T) plus I live in the bathroom so annoying! But I'm doing it! I'm challenging and disciplining myself because I want to continue to change and better myself!

It's so hard! We are coming into fall which means pumpkin spice cappuccino, holiday meals (mashed potato goodness), pumpkin roll, etc.... I LOVE food!!!!!! However I will not give up I have come to far, worked too hard to quit and go back to bad habits!

Keep it up friends!! You can freaking do it!!

Stay healthy because God has the best plans for your life!

Keep challenging yourself!

Live Deep
♥

Be YOU

Don't you dare ever ever ever be jealous of anybody else!

Know who you are in Jesus!

Know that you are AWESOME!

Know that you can do ANYTHING with God's strength!

I use to waste my time being jealous of others but you know what I don't know what they go through. I don't know how hard they work to get to where they are. I now believe in myself and I am learning I absolutely have greatness in me!


So do you!!

Work hard & strive to be the best YOU!

Follow your dreams and work hard to achive them!

If you don't like something, change it. If you can't change it, change your attitude! - Maya Angelou


LIVE DEEP!
♥

Month 1 (part 2): Day 8

It's 9:40 p.m. and I just finished working out. Peeps I've usually been in bed an hour or more by now this is INSANE for me!! I met my girls after work for din din and got home, chatted with hubby, and tried to find a hotel for a wedding we are going to in September. Then after I booked a hotel I thought I'd better get my butt on the floor exercising INSANELY because this girl is soooooooo buying a dress!!!!!! I have not worn a skirt or a dress in at least 5 years probably more! However a dress means legs and arms showing so I needs to get cracking!!


I think the gym has mirrors that make you look fat on purpose so you keep coming back! Who is with me on this? I was at the gym today and BARF! HOWEVER as I was getting dressed into my gym clothes tonight I saw abs forming........ ABS!! Ummmmm I have not seen them.....hmmmmmm ever? Well no, I saw them for a brief period of time right before the marriage and then BAM they were gone like a bacon sundae! POOF!


Friends don't you dare give up! I know how much it just sucks! I know how much you just wish you didn't have to work so hard at it. I know the feeling of just wanting to eat whatever and not have to worry. Let's face the facts we were not blessed with the eating everything in sight but not gaining a pound body. I'm telling you the feeling of accomplishment, the confidence, it's just all so very worth it!! I am absolutely not going back! NOPE! I will not cry another tear in my closet (well except when it needs cleaned and I'm overwhelmed) ! I will not not go out because I don't have anything cute to wear. I WILL NO LONGER WEAR A GIRDLE!!!!!!!!!!!!

do a little no girdle jig!! whoop whoop!!

Keep it up! YOU CAN DO IT!!

Don't only dig deep but LIVE DEEP!!
 ♥

What is your Nineveh?

Happy Tuesday!

I hope you are all doing well, staying disciplined, & enjoying life! I know I know life happens and we get caught up in our problems but I'm learning my attitude towards my problem is so very important. I'm also learning a little thing called obedience and my attitude towards obedience! ugh

I am a very rebellious human being and I'm certain I am not alone in this one! God laid something on my heart months ago and I ignored it. I shrugged it off made a million excuses, let my bitterness get in the way, and just plain pushed it from my mind. The thing is God gives sencond chances (and more). He keeps pursuing us giving us opportunites to obey. He is so cool and I just fall more and more in love with Him!

Storytime~

I saw the production Jonah at Sight and Sound over the weekend and if you get a chance just go see it it is so good!! I keep thinking of Jonah and how the Ninevites killed his father. The pain and bitterness Jonah felt towards these awful people must have been unbearable at times. Then after years of hearing nothing from God feeling like God forgot him, God spoke to Jonah and told him to go save the Ninevites. SAVE THE NINEVITES! God wanted to save these awful awful people and he wanted to do it through Jonah. Of course Jonah didn't want to do it those people don't deserve God's grace! So instead of immediately obeying God Jonah ran away but let's fast forward through the story and God saves Jonah by having a whale swallow him otherwise he would've drowned. HOW CRAZY! God gave Jonah a second chance in the craziest way! Who gets swallowed by a whale I mean really? Ummm Jonah does!! So Jonah was obedient this time and went to Nineveh and preached and those people repented of their sins and were saved!

Friends do you have a Nineveh? Something God has laid on your heart and you haven't obeyed it yet? Just surrender and obey it will be so worth it! He has the best plans for you!

Here is today's devotional from Joyce Meyer's book 'Hearing from God each morning' I feel it ties in pretty well.

♥

Pray, Then Plan

Many plans are in a man's mind, but it is the Lord's purpose for him that will stand. -Proverbs 19:21

God's Word shows us clearly that we need to listen for His voice and commit our ears to a covenant with Him, letting Him sanctify and circumcise our ears so we can hear Him. Many times God clearly shows us what to do, but we don't do it because we don't like His plan. We can even pretend spiritual deafness when we don't like what we clearly hear Him say. Our fleshly appetites and desires can hinder our acceptance of God's truth.

We can come face to face with truth and still not accept it. I admit that truth is often much easier to accept when it concerns other people and their lives than it is when it concerns me and my life. We have a plan for how we want our lives to go, and we have a way that we want to work out that plan. Most of the time we want God to listen to our plan and make it work instead of listening for His plan and asking Him to do what He needs to do to fulfill it through us. We always need to pray first and then make plans instead of making plans and praying for God to make them work. Listen for God's plan; follow it, and you will always succeed.

God's Word for you today: Get God's plan before making your own plans.

So so so so so excited!!!!!

I am sore this time around with month 1.... CRRRAAAAZZZZYYYY!!!!


So guess what?!!?? I am so so so so excited!!!

Did you guess yet?

Ready?

It's pretty exciting!!


Here it goes...


I lost 2% body fat

AND


AND

drumroll please


I bought a size 8 dress pant

yup

size 8

I AM IN SINGLE DIGIT PANTS!!!!!!!!!!! I have not seen single digits in 10 years peeps 10 years!!!!

YOU CAN DO IT!!!

I don't care if you may never see a size 8 maybe your smallest will be a 12~ YOU CAN FREAKING DO IT!!

Work hard & do it!!

DIG DEEP!
♥

Day 4

Pure Cardio is crazy & I love it! I am really pushing to last the entire minute doing the exercises and I just feel so much stronger! However no worries I still yell at Shaun T & grunt a bit! LOL

P.S.~ I snuck on the scale this morning and I'm down the pounds I gained last week plus another .5 so if I eat clean today it should be a great great weigh in day!!


Dancing a jig!!


The finish line is less than two months away!!

♥

Best Decision Ever

I made an awesome awesome decision doing this! I have no idea why but this time around is even better!! It's like a renewed joy for this workout it's crazy! Just like we need to continue to renew our minds we need to renew our workouts haha! I was just going through the motions in month 2 and something wasn't right so I stopped and made new goals and started over!

Don't be afraid to just start over!

My endurance is better! I'm pushing more! I can jump higher, do more pushups, my form is cleaner it's just all around better for me and I'm setting little goals for myself! It's like a competition with myself to improve each time!

I LOVE IT!!

I do need to get the nutrition thing figured out though. I fell off the wagon a bit and now this week I'm back on track eating healthy but I don't think I'm eating enough and I stopped tracking my food weeks back. OOPS! Hey people I have been working hardcore at this weightloss thing for nine freaking months~ I shuda popped out a freaking baby by now!

It's hard work & I know it's going to be hard keeping the weight off! HOWEVER I am one determined spider turtle! HA! spider turtle that's new!! Like it! =D


Keep it up my peeps!

You got it in you to be the best that you can possibly be!!

♥

INSANITY DAY 1

Nope this is not a joke and yes I am a crazy girl!! Last week I almost almost started this program over and I kept going but today I was talking to a great friend and she started over how hilarious! So she absolutely inspired me to do the same! Yup with only four days left I am starting this thang over and no I'm not just starting month 2 over I am starting the ENTIRE INSANITY program over!! Say it go ahead and say it I know what you are thinking.....

I AM AN IDIOT!

HAHA!

Don't care! I was just not in it with month 2 something was off for me...maybe I wasn't ready yet I'm not sure but I'm excited again! I'm excited to improve and achieve for EXCELLENCE! Starting before I complete it will help me to want to finish it and not give up!

I am going to be a lean mean fighting machine!!


WOOT WOOT!

Reach your goals and don't be afraid to stop and start over!

Achieve for greatness!

♥

INSANITY DAY 57 ish

I can't count~ just sayin'


Well my friends this is my last week of INSANITY! It's been INSANE to say the least! I am actually going to complete something I have started and that right there is AWESOMESAUCE! I am about to break my give up reputation!! woot woot!!

I am tired I ain't gonna lie! I am losing momentum and I'm ready for this to be over! I am ready to concentrate on weight lifting again and switch things up! I am however going to do this routine from start to finish AGAIN I just haven't decided when. Maybe around the holidays to keep me motivated! ;)

I'm not going to reach the goal I was hoping for but I'm just truly proud of myself for doing this! I have become more goal oriented, more disciplined, STRONGER, I am a freaking spider monkey boys & girls like ninja turtle spider monkey! When I started I could barely do one push up the girl kind! eeek! Now I can do 16 guy push ups heck maybe more I'm not sure I'll let ya know! =D


Dig Deep my friends you absolutely have it in you!!


Keep on keeping on!
♥

Insanity Day 49 or 50 or somethin'

Well the finish line is near my friends! What an INSANE two months this has been! I'm honestly debating sending in for the free T-shirt now or taking a small break and doing it all over again. I know I have more in me to give! I can amp things up and work harder! I only lost somewhere between 5-10 lbs on this program but the strength and attitude I developed is just worth all the soreness and exhaustion. I have muscle under this last bit of fat I'd like to shed. ;) Pretty

                                                  R I D I C U L O U S

Never Give up! If you are still trying to lose weight keep going! You may have hit a plateau but keep truckin' it won't last forever if you discipline yourself and stay determined! Get plenty of sleep because when you are tired is when you slip up. STAY STRONG! You have it in you to be the best you that you can be!




DIG DEEP
 ♥

Is God Waiting For You?

Well the weekend is about over and we are about to start another week. Oh Mr. Monday how you are hated by many! You know what though we have the choice to dread it, grumble about it, moan and complain and sigh and stomp our feet and have our hissy fit OR we can choose to have a good attitude about it and be obedient to our sweet God and do as Philippians 2:14 says: Do everything without grumbling and complaining. HA!

Maybe this song will encourage you: http://youtu.be/AnmWwudeqfM (Mandisa- Good Morning feat. Toby Mac)

Storytime~

Towards the end of the Made To Crave bible study until recently I have been struggling to really find that closeness with God again. I felt His presence when He lifted me from my pit and when He spoke to my heart about leading the bible study. He gave me strength through the weight loss and it has been so amazing but then suddenly I felt NOTHING! I was in a rut with losing weight and slipping from God and it almost felt like God abandoned me in a way~ silly I know~ but I was so scared that I would allow myself to go back to old ways but then He brought me INSANITY at just the right time and yup it has been INSANE!! I have been taught even more discipline and learning a lot about myself and my strengths... it's been the best thing ever! However yet again I feel that slip away from God like maybe I've taken control back again but the thing is God is so good and so faithful and so very much there. It's like each time He brings me to a new level but it is up to me to do my part as well and to absolutely let God have control!!

Ok so every year my mother- in- law and I go to the Joyce Meyer conference and it's always awesome awesome awesome but deep down I just knew there would be something different about this year for me. I knew God had something to tell me this year and I needed to feel His presence in a big way infact I was believing hard for Him to speak to my heart. One thing Joyce said hit me hard you see her teaching was on obedience and on Friday evenings session she asked a question that knocked me over. You ready? She asked this: Are you waiting on God or is God waiting on you? OUCH OUCH OUCH! Friends this entire time I've been on this journey knowing I'm in "the waiting period" HOWEVER I'm looking at it very much in a different way now. God has big plans ready for my life however I'm not being obedient there is a lot I have to learn and grow with and I know without a doubt that He is absolutely waiting on me. He is waiting on me to take a step of faith, He is waiting on me to clean up my act. Friends it ain't gonna be easy I can tell you that but the awesome thing is if I just take time to be with God and just come into His presence and ask him to Empower me to Obey. Yes, we can ask Him to help us obey Him. Crazy? I don't care! I need help I'm not afraid to admit it!! I am a sinner and I mess up tons! God help me! I want the life of peace and joy and happiness and I will continue to be miserable if I continue to be rebellious and disobedient and (cough cough) bratty! Just like I workout when I don't feel like it I have got to be nice when I don't feel like it, be sweet, stop the snarky comments, stop the judging the gossiping, be the Christian God has called me to be. You say it's too hard what's the point? Ummm being miserable is hard! Being miserable sucks! I would rather my flesh have a temporary time of hissy fits and learn some discipline in order to live a great life. Plus I want to take my loved ones home to heaven with me and how do I do that when I'm a bratty hypocrite of a Jesus girl?

Character is developed when we do what God tells us to do whether we want to or not. (Life point from Joyce Meyer)

The world wants tolerance but God wants holy. -Joyce Meyer

Christians we have got to step up our game. We have got to shake off the hypocrite reputation. Start each morning asking God for help! Start each morning reciting 1 Corinthians 13 if we have to. Get on your knees and pray! Find a quiet place~ there are times I just sit in my car after pulling into the garage. I just sit there and talk to God. Whatever works just do it!! Dust off your bible & read it!! It is such a beautiful thing being close to God. Friends if you have never received God as your savior please please I ask you to do it. Repent of your sins and ask Him into your heart and into your life. He is the best thing that will ever happen to you!! No, life won't instantly be rainbows and puppies but you will have someone to walk through life with. Someone to pick you up when you fall, someone to cry with when people let you down. Life is so so short we have got to take it seriously! We need to enjoy it and want God's best for us! He wants us to be obedient for a reason.....to help us!

Have an awesome week! Dig deep! Don't give up!

♥

Here is today's devotion from 'Hearing from God each Morning'

God Sees Your Heart

-Joyce Meyer

Thank God, though you were once slaves of sin, you have become obedient with all your heart to the standard of teaching in which you were instructed and to which you were committed. Romans 6:17

When we receive Christ as our Savior, God gives us a new heart- one that wants to do what is right. However, it takes a while for our behavior to catch up with our new heart and that is often very frustrating. One part of us wants to do right, yet another part of us fights against it. That is the war between the flesh and the spirit that Paul discusses in Galations 5:17.

At the new birth, God equips us inwardly with all we need to live holy, obedient lives. We are made new (2 Corinthians 5:17) I like to say we are made new spiritual clay and we spend our lives letting the Holy Spirit mold us into the image of Christ (Romans 8:29). We need to thank God that we have a new heart, one that wants to be obedient.

Celebrate your progress and don't be discouraged because God sees your heart. If we let go of what lies behind and keep pressing toward the place of total obedience, God is pleased. We are learning to walk with God and walking is the slowest mode of travel that exists. You may not be where you want to be, but thank God you have an obedient heart.

God's Word For You Today: Focus on Jesus today, not on your failures.

Oh my aching bazooka

An old coworker use to say that and now it has even more meaning: Oh my aching bazooka

I hurt boys & girls AND I LOVE IT!!!!!!

Month 2 is INSANE but I look forward to it! Yes I said it I look forward to working out!! I am hooked!!

I also amped the nutrition.... I'm following the INSANITY nutrition plan hoping it helps with my energy and shed some fat!! =)

Not sure my "after" pic will be exactly where I want but I am sooooooo getting that dang T-shirt!


Diggin' Deep
 ♥

What the french fries?!?!

Month 2 HURTS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

So why not we make the workouts more challenging AND longer?!? You are already exhausted so let's kick up the exhaustion times a billion yo !

What the french fries Shaun T? Really?

Two days ago I did an hour workout where there were NO rests NONE NADA ZILTCH!!!!!

AND

yesterday I did the recovery workout with the yoga balancing crap and the strength pulsing...puke....barf... LOATHE IT!!

AND AND

today I hurt but I'm expected to do another hour long workout! pfffftttttt!!

I'm not gonna lie I paused the dvd about half way through to give myself a pep talk because I was ready to shut the dang thing off. I kept saying, "You can do this! You got this! Look how far you've made it! You can do all things through Christ! No obstacle is too big for you with God on your side!" I turned the thing back on and pushed! I didn't have much left in me but I got through it and I feel

STRONG!

LOVE IT!

DIG DEEP!

NO EXCUSES!


BAZINGA!!

♥

Month 2: WHAT???

Whaaaaaaa!!!!!!!!!

Workouts are more challenging AND longer AND I sweat more if that was even possible!!!!!

Today I hurt 

 I LOVE IT!!!!!!

Get out and move!!

DIG DEEP!

♥

Month 2 Here we go!!!

Well my friends last week was "Recovery" week and I totally recovered. I'm not gonna lie I had things going on in life and I didn't do my dvd every single day but I really feel my body needed that rest I feel so ready to start month 2 let's get started baby!!!!!

Yesterday I tried on the jeans I was wearing last summer at this time and ummmmm WOW!! I use to fill those jeans out and I was to the point where I almost needed a bigger pair. These jeans I am keeping as a reminder of the days I would drop to the floor of my closet and just cry. I was so upset with myself and so very miserable! I absolutely refuse to ever go back!!! Heading North for life peeps FOR LIFE!! I am so excited!!! I feel so so good!

This exhaustion has been so very worth it!!!!

← ooh look a sneak peak at my arm! LOL






I'm ready for you INSANITY Month 2 LET'S GET THIS PARTY STARTED!!!!


Stay tuned my blog readers stay tuned this could get interesting!! =)

Day 30~ Stinkin' Thinkin'

I truly wish I would've posted on Day 28 which was weigh in day. I was on top of the world happy because I FINALLY reached a total weight loss of 40 lbs!!!!! (actually 41) I looked in the mirror and just thanked God for getting me this far! It's been difficult yet the results are making it so very worth it.

This week however I was hit with awful mood swings that are extremely hard to control. It's more difficult for me to just slap on a smile and fake through it. (use to be pretty good at that) So as I push through the poopy emotions I am pushing through the disappointing fact that it's day 30 and I have only lost 4 lbs with Insanity. It's hard to concentrate on the fact that this was the push I needed to get over my hurdle. That I was working so very hard on my own and lost 35 lbs but then my body finally said I'm done and taking a break. So instead of taking the chance of letting old habits creep back in I bought INSANITY to push through it and not give up! It's hard to concentrate on the fact that I've lost around 2% of my body fat and around 5 inches. I can do walking planks, and push up jacks, and moving push ups when I started I could barely do one. I have worked so so so hard but this week it's hard for me to focus on the positives but guess what I am doing it anyway! I have worked so so hard and I'm stronger and slowly getting leaner I absolutely am not giving up! I want badly to just say "screw it what's the point".  The husband just took a service call and I want badly to just hop in the car and go to McDonalds. You know what I have learned discipline in this journey and to fight emotions and to fight the cravings and I'm not stopping now! I have come to damn far for a stupid french fry to ruin it all!! I'm gonna put my big girl panties on and get through this emotional hurdle and keep pushing on & DIGGING DEEP!


You can do it!!! Push through the emotions..... the stinkin' thinkin' and realize you are AWESOME and made for so much more than a food addiction or laziness or grumpy attitudes whatever it may be. You were made for excellence and to be the best you that you can possibly be!

Don't you dare go around that same mountain because I sure ain't!!

DIG DEEP
 ♥

Day 26: 100% INSANITY

Well my little blog readers it took me 26 days and I am almost ashamed to admit it but tonight is the first I can actually say I gave 100% and truly mean it! My flesh wanted to give up but I found that place deep inside and I pushed hard and jogged faster, and jumped higher, and gave it my absolute all!

I even yelled 'hell no you aren't quitting' outloud at the t.v. and it felt awesome!! For the first time since I started this journey I felt really really proud of myself and felt like I could conquer the world! This program has been the best purchase ever and has taught me so much about myself! I have it in me to go beyond what I thought were my limits! Giving up is NOT an option for once in my life!!!

I not only sweat more than I ever sweat before but I was breathing the heaviest yet so far!! I am so freaking proud of myself!! I didn't think it was possible to sweat anymore but I was soaked and I mean clothes soaked...... even my coochie had sweat dripping from it LOL!! (yea sorry tmi)


I was hoping to get a good picture of the sweat but I don't think you can tell but here is a picture of me after the workout my friends! If this girl can do it you absolutely have it in you! Keep striving to be the best YOU that you can be & DIG DEEP!

♥

100% INSANITY

Days 22-25

I'm still hanging in there boys & girls still hanging in.....

Yesterday I slipped on the eating a bit (well actually in reality I ate clean during the day that I still stayed within my plan) ~ went for wing nite and just felt poopy after! Too much salt & grease yet I didn't spend time in the John so that's a plus. This morning I am so thirsty & feel gross. bleh but I peeked on the scale yesterday morning and I should have a good weigh in result Sunday if I don't fall off the wagon completely this weekend. Gotta STAY STRONG!

I've been pushing through the workouts. My least favorite dvd is actually the cardio recovery and I know that's INSANE since it's the least strenuous but I loathe squats and lunges and pulsing and ewwwwww it makes me angry! Grrr!!!!

I apologize ahead of time but I just don't think I will bare my arms after Month 1 so I will push hard in Month 2 because I HAVE to wear t-shirts it would be disappointing not to after all this INSANITY!! AND I would love love love to buy cute dresses too that's my goal even if I don't reach the weight range I'd like to I'd still like to be toned and comfy enough for t-shirts and dresses.

=)

IT WILL BE DONE!!!!!!

DIG DEEP!

Days 20-21

I have lost NO weight or NO inches this week!! I was so frustrated yesterday after I weighed in. I have worked so hard and I'm almost to day 30 and I've lost what maybe 5lbs. BOO HOO!! Yea Yea I have learned to have peace with the scale it's not the number that counts blah blah blah but damnit I want that number to go DOWN DOWN DOWN!! So I took my bratty attitude and I ate and I ate all the wrong crap and I didn't care! Now did that help the situation? Nope! Did I feel better? Nope! (well temporarily until the food went down the pipes and out the bum) So I looked back on last week and guess what? I didn't drink enough water AND I wasn't logging my food so I could've ate too little or ate too much I wouldn't know because I didn't log it! TISK TISK

I soooooo know better so today I worked it HARDCORE! I just pushed the hardest I pushed and my head is soaked and I still have sweat pouring down. It felt good!!

Game on scales Game on!!

Days: 17-19

Well I am super excited to share with you a few things but let's go backward a bit to a few days ago....

Day 17:  The 4th of July I worked it and I wanted to punch Shaun T in the farking face!! It was a hot day & I was soaked and tired! I had no picnics to attend so I ate clean as well. (Ok so I tried making Turkey burgers and I'm not gonna lie the turkey gamy taste just creeped me out not sure I'll do those again)

Day 18: "Rest Day"  Well to be honest I came home and ate almost an entire packet of ritz crackers while dipping them in salsa. Not really sure what got into me~ maybe it was the lack of picnic food I'm not sure so I did do a Brooke Burke workout (not as intense) but I'll still call it my rest day as far as INSANITY goes! ;)

Day 19: Ok are you ready? Que the music!!!! I JUMPED!!! I jumped & I jumped high I was like a ninja warrior princess extraordinaire!!! I don't know what got into me especially since I waited until after work to do INSANITY ?!!?!? BaNaNaS!!!  Actually you know what I do know what got into me.....you ready for this? I had my afternoon dump at work and as I was sitting on el tolieto I looked down at my legs and you'll never guess what!?!?!?

Are you ready?


You sitting down?

My
Legs
Do
NOT
touch

Yup you heard me my legs don't touch when I'm sitting down people!!!!!! Chubby ladies you will understand this!! Now granted it's like a centemeter or whatever the tiniest little gap but it soooooooo counts!!!!!!

THEY DON"T TOUCH!!!!!!


That right there is enough for me to JUMP for joy!

This white girl really CAN jump!

BOOYA

Day 16: Cardio somethin or other

THIS SUCKS!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Well I have had two glorious days off of work but I still worked out today! I came close to puking up my lunch today but I pushed through & kept yelling CHOCOLATE CAKE CHOCOLATE CAKE! (yesterday I ate a piece of triple layered chocolate cake from Olive Garden) Today's workout motivation was the orgasmic experience of the chocolate ganache touching my taste buds!!!

*bliss*

Day 15: Fit Test

Apparantly today is day 15 and I can't count (suprise suprise). Well today is the first day I feel like vomitting! :( Not cool!! I pushed myself through the fit test and I improved in most exercises & stayed the same for the jumping ones. I have pwoblems jumping what can I say this white girl cannot jump! I have not been promoted to spider monkey just yet. (ninja turtles I have let you down) I could give you every excuse in the book however deep down I know I'm just not pushing hard with the jumps due to fear and it's time to let go!!!


This week is soooooooo on!!!


After I go vomit first....


DIG DEEP

Day: 13 (i think)

I lost another 1.5 lbs and a total of 4 inches!! A half inch has been lost around my bat wings I'm so excited!!!

I got through the Pure Cardio insanity today & I'm just really really tired!! Oh! Also~ I'm wearing medium t-shirts! WAHOO!!!!!  And the t-shirts I'm wearing to workout in are size Large and they hang on me it's so farking exciting!!!

However I need to invest in some headbands because this girl's hair is getting in the way! Grrrr!!!


Tomorrow is the fit test so stay tuned!!


DIG DEEP

Day: I've lost count

Thursday was "RECOVERY" workout and yesterday I tried working out after work and made it through about half of the warm up and just quit. I just didn't have the energy to make the workout worth it and my form was sloppy which could cause injury so I will just call yesterday my rest day and workout Sunday instead. I am determined to get through this entire INSANITY series no injuries to stop me please!!

Today I'm back in the game and the clothes were coming off! I'm dripping in sweat, huffing & puffing, pushing through the pain I LOVE IT!! I have not pushed myself like this.....well.....ever!! I lost a bunch of weight and was running and lifting weights about 10ish years ago but I never pushed myself like I am now!! It's INSANE!! The one thing that suprises me is I'm not sore... like I can't move I want to stab Shaun T sore. I haven't figured this one out yet. My calves were tight this week but heck I wear crazy high heels that have caused that before so it's no big deal to me. I have been drinking a sports "recovery" type drink after my workouts so maybe this is what helps my muscles recover.

http://www.amway.com/CathrynBarnes/Shop/Product/Product.aspx/NUTRILITE-Twist-Tubes-Tropical-Sport-flavor?itemno=105485


However right now I'm shaking trying to type this it's crazy. Tomorrow is weigh in day and I have to remember to measure myself as well. Monday I take the fit test again so I'm anxious to see improvement. I seriously can see a difference in my body even with the shape. Friends I found my freaking knees this week!!!!! I have knees it's AMAZING!! They have been covered up by flab for so long I lost them a few years back! So exciting! I am even going to go as far as saying I predict by day 30 I will be baring my arms!!! Yes I said ARMS!!!!!!!!!!

Do a little dance!! woot woot!!!



DIG DEEP!

Day: 9&10

People this is absolutely NOT fun for me! This sucks!! I could not get up these last two mornings so I have worked out after work which really really really sucks! I was grumpy today and came home and wanted to grab some chips & dip and sit on the couch HOWEVER I did my INSANE workout and right now I have so much sweat dripping off of me I can barely see to type this!

Don't you dare make any excuses boys & girls DON'T YOU DARE!! You have the strength, the motivation, the willpower you just have to DIG DEEP!! My calves hurt today but I made it I didn't die my flesh wanted to be whiney and mopey and give every excuse not to workout but I did it! I can honestly say this is the hardest I've worked out yet because I wanted to shut my grumpy flesh up!!!

Get your butt moving!

DIG DEEP